Fears, you just have to realize they are fears... based on brain activity or hurt...

So I have fears. Not as many as many, but enough that I feel normal and responsive to what could happen, and how to make it better before the battle I fear.

I made a lot of folks, that don't know me, worried just enough when I passed out, but my doctor and the doctors that really checked me out only fear one remaining thing - that I won't listen to their professional advice.  That I do understand. The heart doctor from the Army Hospital called yesterday, and then again today. I was home and answered today with all the responses he wanted and one he wasn't ready for, but he said he would look into it. I believe he will and fix it. I trust him.

Fear of returning to exercise, not mine, so I did, but I did it in little efforts not some hard charging damn the torpedoes full speed ahead... mode. It felt fine, I really am at the age that a little romance would go so much farther than fourteen human reproductive acts. It is the same with exercise, keep moving, it doesn't count only if not moving, the days of repeating marathon training sessions and karate practice drills over and over are gone - not needed. I have been there, done that, and still have t-shirts and trophies for my best. Same with exercise. Now some of my doctors don't know, but my personal physician does and he is okay with my check up and testing. I can't fix all their fears but I don't have to share them, nor restrict myself to their fears zones.

So I avoid New York, California, Colorado, New Jersey and now Maryland. They fear me, I understand that Maryland has a list of proper pistol carriers and is ambushing them when they enter the state. There you go, allowing yourself to be restricted by the fears of the different state protective services, or local jack booted uniformed thugs. I do think that race played a big part in the ambush, fear you know. But Maryland, is now on my list, and I have been there armed before. Fears.

Now the National Rifle Association has a mission statement, that Harvey Weinstein has never read, but he knows what they do so he is making a movie that will cause the NRA to wish it were DEAD. When they listed all the terrorist propaganda entertainment movies that man makes - I was thinking he is shooting himself in the foot (or head?). The Lawyers will get to sue him for promoting terrible gun handling that seems to produce dead bodies all over the place, which is what he thinks the NRA does. Not because he knows anything about firearms, just how to peddle porn - gun porn, sex porn it is all the same to him, all he needs is the money. So he is going to make a movie that only stupid liberals will watch to see the truth about the NRA. The smart liberals will stay home. They fear what exists, not what doesn't exist. I will have to check and see, but I am betting that I don't own any of his movies in video or dvd, although I know I have seen a couple - but the gun violence and martial arts were not very good. Actually, I do own a couple, but even bad people do good things some times.

Seeing how the market is, when the stocks of the gun industry tank (which they won't) I would be buying like crazy. Actually, why couldn't I get 22lr again today? I have been good. But maybe I don't fear the famine enough yet, I still have bows and arrows, so patient I am. No fear!

I recommend the movie LONE SURVIVOR

Since I am just me, and no one really pays too much attention to me I still say it is a great movie.

A WAR movie, very.

It has been attacked as propaganda - which is really the reason I saw the movie before reading the book. Normally I do it the other way.

I can see where the call of 'propaganda' came from, it was from some one that has no personal value system, that doesn't understand the military, the Special Operations community, and certainly has no real idea of what Afghanistan is nor ever has been.

I will own the DVD as soon as it comes out. Even the special effects guys got most of the explosions right, not all of them but most. Great movie, sad story but heroic on so many levels. I do recommend seeing it.

I wonder where yesterday went...

Bad start for the week was Monday. And I don't even have a place I was supposed to report to for work or something. My gym bag was packed and waited by the door. But I was out of it. Two bowls of oatmeal for the day as I had a very upset stomach, then after another six hours of fitful sleep I was on to steak and green beans.

I did my rowing 6.2 miles in 56 min 36 seconds. Stop and get a drink, measure BP and Hr and then go for the Expresso.com Bike. Pick the 13.5 mile course and pedal away, getting over fifty-five seconds ahead of my personal best. But on the down hill side the ghost starts to catch me and finally does at about ten miles, about the same time I am slowing down, tired and sweaty and a bit under the weather. I want to go and sleep. That was when I woke, wondering how that guy got in my house, oops! I am still attached to the pedals, get free, lay there having everyone wonder if I am okay, what is my name, do I hurt anywhere (just my pride). Well, I had decided to keep going when I should have stopped. My blood pressure and circulation wasn't meeting all demands and when the brain is drained it shuts down, kind of like the Federal government, no one in charge, everyone sleeping it off.

The bike shut down when there was no more activity, I thought I had lost all my electronic exercise - I was competing to complete the Titan Challenge, 5000 calories burned off in January. Well, I was told to lay still, and the medical alert guys from the Fire Department were on the way. What was my name, when was I born, where did I live, what was my telephone number, was there anyone to call? Nice concerned worried people. The medics got there, more professional worried people - by this time I was cracking jokes and trying to wipe the concern away from their faces. I only look old I am still thirty-five inside, just a conservative thirty-five. The closest hospital emergency room was where they wanted to take me, I told them Madigan would be better, and they liked that.

So one took my locker key, got all my stuff out of the locker, took my Caravan and parked it near the emergency room and gave me back my keys. All the data, was entered into an iPad, radio contact with receiving emergency rooms, details of event (how do you keep from being a problem - when you wake up -RUN away and escape!).  I wasn't allowed to walk, gurney and wheel chair, lots of blood work, continuous monitoring, one IV drip, more nurses and doctors than anyone should need in a day - how I impressed them. Well, I didn't stop breathing or my heart pumping, although one doctor asked if they could shock me back into rhythm or do chest compressions, and put an oxygen tube down my throat. Which I told her sounded like a threat but sure if I needed either. Her husband and she transferred recently from Fort Bragg, 82nd Airborne, and I had to ask if he was adjusting to working at half speed. She knew immediately what I was talking about. After a deployment she told me that 'we would get a command' which I told her was a great way to think about that. Not that the Medical Corps doesn't have its own command structure and she as a Captain would get promoted one day and might become a commander - I don't really know how they pick commanders outside of the combat arms.

I got some chest x-rays which they compared with the last set they had done on me, they found the same question they had the last time and suggested two more tests for that, after I see my family doctor and check in with him. They know something about ornery old men, and made me promise three or four ways to cooperate with their concerns. So, they took the needle out of my arm, the monitoring was turned off and I got my stuff and wandered the parking lot looking for my Caravan, which was where he had said it would be, luckily I was one of the few. Drove home, picked up the mail, ate mondu soup, had coffee and watched a video. Then checked my exercises in the computer and find on the Expresso.com list - they gave me credit for starting the run. "1/14/2014      Totals: 11.1 Miles 446 Calories 0 Chase Score

Completed Laps" And now I have 2400 calories down, only 2600 left to go. 

Think I will now go to bed and get some sleep.

So I found three hundred dollars, and there ain't no ammo to be had...

I want some more 22lr ammunition and can't find any... oh, it is listed then is 'sold out' or something similar. The wonders of the internet. Why can't England or Australia make us lots and lots,  it isn't like they have to worry about too much ammunition falling into their citizens' hands. They can sell it all to the USA, we will buy all they make that is good.

I have enough personal ammunition, but the need for new shooters, for those that want to practice, for those interested in plinking and hunting - those needs must be met. The local manufacturers say they are running shifts full time, but I don't think so, Soros bought them all out and slowed production -- or he didn't. But for the market not to adjust to the demand, that is an artificial constraint - which seems like government stupidity.

Not that the government has ever been stupid, we can't even get Astronauts to the International Space Station... America in decline, worried about terrorists and the poverty stricken, which were both created by stupid government programs. Don't take my word for it, look it up.

Happy Birthday to me. Sixty-six and a couple left un-counted... yet.

I am about to turn the computer off for the second time today, breaking free, thank you.

There are rules and laws... and my wife will make more rules

Everyone seems to want rules, law. They say it is good because Man is evil, or can't be controlled in their desires and lusts, or just because that makes it seem safer - if everyone is playing by the rules.

Establishing my own rules works best for me, no one cares what they are as long as they don't seem to affect anyone else. When I decide to expand my rules to those I am working with or living with, we will have adjustments, but can still get along.

There are hundreds of laws, adjustments and rules no one is paying attention to... because they are written in dead languages of civilizations or of people that no longer exist. They even had laws and rules that no one wrote down, just oral traditions.

We all end up living by our own code of rules, things we won't do, things we must do.  So in the end where is it felt that folks so far away can make more rules I am not paying attention to, in languages I don't speak about things I already know I won't do, ever?

New Year, first day at the range...

So after coffee and breakfast I put the rifle in the Caravan and drove to the range and took point sixteen on Range 15. My goal was to become better with my Marlin 795 LTR.  Knowledge can go along way to making a shooter a rifleman with what he brought to shoot.

I started with Federals and wasn't happy, so I switched to Federal Champions, which seemed to work better. I was having some issues with the ejection not completing before feeding another round. So I looked hard at the ejector and put some leverage on it to bend it slightly to where I thought it should be. Suddenly I had a real semi-automatic rifle. I made some sight adjustments, D12 L4, then shot another target then D8, then shot another target and then R1. And I had not used the sling yet.

Finally, I moved the shooting bench, laid a mat down, and slung up and shot two five round magazines.



I am such an old fellow, still I was happy enough. To bring it all back home. Until the next time, I sure do need more practice, come on weather, just about ten degrees better and we will be rocking. I know I am old by the number of AR platforms on the rifle side of the range. So out of touch. And the communist rifles and bullets.