Afraid to go out and face facts...

I have been playing with my fear, not examining it, and then facing it and conquering it... I am frozen in fear. Sigh.

I am enjoying watching Waterloo with Rod Steiger, one of the finest Historical movies made. Made coffee, made breakfast gruel and still have the fear.  Watched a bit of Fobes on FOX, watched a bit of Neil Cavuto on Business. Nothing breaks the fear, it seems this is all just distractions to the need to face the fear.

I have come to the conclusion on the Gun Control - 2nd Amendment debate/conflict/and the Revolution or Total Collapse of American Civilization that I will stand with the LORD. I know the weapons, the tactics and history and such - the only thing that will work is Godliness. I am sure that surrender to the LORD, makes more sense than surrendering to people of power that can't make a budget, figure out where the money went, and constantly tarnish their lives by bad or even evil behavior.

Still haven't faced that fear, the one in my mind, and there doesn't seem to be a better time than now. Wish me luck... how do those fears get planted and fed? Where is that instant fear killer when one needs it?

Now where am I?

End of February, 2013, and sure enough I didn't get a retirement check from the folks that have been taking my money for years while I was employed. Sending a check to my Checking account, knowing my spouse's name, SSN and date of birth.  Sure enough they want all that again, and don't submit original documents, do get it notarized and send it to us soon. Amazing, how out of touch one becomes from everything, although they all want the SSN, they then decide that I must prove that number is I. And what would happen if it isn't?

The Assessment time is here, two months gone from 2013, and how am I doing? What still needs to get done? How much time do I have, what is the priority? We do have one don't we?

Amazed at how much of my life, looking back recently, isn't based on what is on the television (or cable). Have I missed a great movie? a book that must be read? Are there bills unpaid? File for retirement, file for taxes, why am I not assisted by these government agencies - don't they have to accommodate those functioning less than perfectly?

Seems like I weigh just a bit less than I did in December of 2012, that is good. When working out at the YMCA today I found an eleven and a half mile bike ride after a 5k row, with a mile slog with Fox News captions. A little rope pull and a hot shower and the day is done.

Yep, need some more assessment, for I must be falling behind those important things in one's life -- if I could just remember what they are.

What is a law for anyway?

I would hope that law would provide protection of everyone from threats, although it seems that most laws are only threats and outlaws and rebels ignore them.

If the law, is that: A well regulated militia is necessary for the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed. Seems very straight forward, positive, and non threatening. Being a law for the government, without a punishment listed I would assume that violation of that law would be treason or just impossible to break. Enough of that, I am not that stupid.

But I am a simple man, and ancient but I do want you to know that I don't really run around obeying some fools' laws. I am normally going around behaving well because my parents, friends, family and neighbors expect me to be a fine fellow.  Life is sure easier that way.

I stopped at a Safeway one night, going to get a sandwich and some snacks for a long drive, and since I was there I picked up two bottles of Blackberry wine.  Now, I am not a drunk, had not been drinking, was intending to take the bottles home where I have a glass of wine in the evening with my wife - no more than one a day, like they recommend.

But stupid thoughts in Olympia, Washington had been put to paper that drunk driving would be reduced by stopping Earl and all his kind from purchasing alcoholic beverages between the hours of something to something. Drunk driving is a problem - so many legisators and public officials and judges seem to do it and get caught. They are not alone, other drunks are out there - and from my criminal contacts when asked about this law, they all told me that most snack and beverage shops will have an employee with alcohol in the trunk of his vehicle that he will sell during those hours.

Now I don't care to change the law about alcohol sales, I want more responsible adults, and longer jail terms for those caught driving under the influence - like two weeks in a Chinese prison, or a DHS re-education camp.

But it was one of the many laws, good intentioned folks with too much time on their hands have passed to make the world safer but sillier, without achieving their intentions. Failure, again.

So, just to keep my bonifides in the Gun Control Contentions, the outlaw and the rebel will not follow any laws about firearms - except the one about not being caught without enough firepower for the fury and the fight. The armed law abiding person will have to decide if this is just another stupid law - like homosexual activities and dope smoking, that being lawful is just not the way one lives with the LORD.


I do know, that representatives elected to positions of power, that can't do the functions of government outlined in the Constitution, aren't really smart enough to be followed, nor listened to, but they should be confronted constantly. Where is the budget?    

I have been away, trying to reduce the death by recliner..

So Friday night I turned the three computers off, and the link, and went to Ariel, Washington to the Wolverton Mt. Gun Club for two full days of Appleseed. The weather started with snow flakes, water everywhere, gusting winds and cold. But we waded it out, and got into the reason and the organization, safety, rules to shoot by and then we got the rifles out and starting shooting.

Two ranges, plenty of instructors for the brave 19 that showed up, lent some materials and a bit of ammunition. You have heard there seems to be a shortage? For totally unknown reasons the line I was working had faster times completing training and shooting, so the normal Time Monkey was hiding from the chill in the air and puddles, too. I was line boss in the morning, 2nd Strike during lunch, and safety officer/instructor in afternoon.

Fine instructor dinner down the road in Cougar, where I also found a place to shower, sleep and watch the show about who is the best chest pounding combat pairs. I learned long ago in very hot places the quiet ones you never notice are the baddest.




 You do know that I just would love to have an M1A with a rail and a scout mounted scope, with about six ten round magazines, I promise I won't bring it to New York, Governor Coumo. Now if I can just get Mayor Bloomberg to buy my ammunition for it. Best be some very good letters to send to them.

Next day, back at the refresher and instruction, more shooters come out and some folks change lines, Rifleman patches being earned by paying attention and persistence. Time Monkey still no where to be found, I shift to the other range in the afternoon after lunch. I give the Known Distance information for their future shooting skills. Everything wraps up well, about five Riflemen made, loud Huzzahs! mark the ceremony, I am off starting to clean up so we can pack out.

Finally, finished I get into the Caravan and head back for the drive home. Two and a half hours in Sunday evening traffic, stop for more coffee, and hang on until the welcoming lights of home. I feel much like the chainsawed Bigfoot that was getting moist and mossy, but very happy for the difference we made with the new and experienced shooters. I got to do one 1907 sling presentation for the one shooter using such, and it really worked for him after, so he is on his way.

So, I have done enough for the day...

Visited the YMCA, but was lazy so I won't brag about my renewed body - it is still out of warranty and needs more adjustment.

On my way out to the Caravan, a younger (much) man called to me and asked if I had jumper cables, seems he had left his lights on while he was inside. In Washington we drive in rain with the lights on, and it is always raining. 

Anyway, I said I was pretty sure I had some, went to the back, got them out and moved my car beside his, popped and propt our hoods and red to positive, black to negative or ground. It took a little bit to get his battery up and turn over his starter, but it happened. 

He thanked me as I unhooked him, then he tried to give me a twenty, but I laughed and told him to buy some jumper cables. There is a reason old guys carry such things, we don't always have a twenty.

Wondering how the world is going to act since the President says we can't make it on his plan, the Congress says we can't make it by cutting budget, which I never have seen them produce.  But since I am still waiting for more stupidity about control of Gun Violence by restricting Assault Rifles - both of which are made up and not going to happen anyway... I have stopped looking to media and politicians for real solutions. They can't tell me how to make a shot, they certainly don't have any idea on how to protect me from thugs that they create in Chicago with their perfect systems of criminal justice.

As I was telling my wife, the money is fake, the repayment on the debts is all fake, the system won't stand up to real inspection -- it will all come down. She grew up in a country that changed money, governments and stuff. She believes in gold, rice fields (own some) and hard work with family and friends. Have some jumper cables, water, tools.... times are going to get tougher, cooperate.

So why isn't this Great Society working?

Probably because it was never designed to 'work' only to care for those that fell outside of success.

From the Holy Bible, one is supposed to care for the widows and orphans, now my belief is that the word 'widow' was used for an unmarried woman with a child - how ever she got to that status. It was the duty of the community to care for them, they were allowed to glean the fields and such. Not an easy life but still not totally starving.

I am no expert on the Holy Bible, there are many things I am still discovering, but for sure it has more to offer me than some things I am hearing from conventional wisdom.

Ever wonder why there problems in Chicago, with all the money the Democrats give their favorite causes? The little Baptist Churches do much better with less, the Catholic schools do better with less, and the list of good people doing good things in Chicago go far beyond race, political party, religious community. But it just doesn't get into the political process nor the ruling elite, they seem to be permanently corrupt, EVIL. But they keep getting re-elected by the Daly's dead voters, and no one in Chicago is surprised. That is all a myth of mythical proportions. No truth to it. They aren't evil just plain old fashioned stupid. They don't see that it doesn't work.

In America, you work and make your life, you read and educate yourself (yes, there are great and good teachers, but really you know who is responsible), you make friends, you do good things for good reasons - never for money. You invest in a future, you don't borrow with no intention of repaying quickly. You look for a mate, build a family, do more good things, and some how, you die. But the little world you built, or helped along the way, the people you touched are all better for your being there when it mattered.

You can do most of that anywhere in the world, and we will all be better for it. No one has to be wrong, do bad things, become hated, become a problem... The problem with the Great Society, is the title. It should be the humble and nice society - no capitalization, and it isn't a government program, it is a human program called humanity. Be nice out there, another million laws or so - only employ too many lawyers, politicians and criminal injustice - y'all be nice and we will git it done right.

What we leave behind... is what we are...

Studying the Assyrians, and they didn't leave behind much except the terror of being City Breakers, and stone monuments to the warriors, their chariots, the siege engines and the conquests. The Sub-Asia peoples give us statues of near naked women and men wrapped in lust or something... The current Syrian Prince and peoples give us news highlights and fear of terrorists with deadly gas and the current Bollywood gives us several cinematic adventures and romances and lots of dances.

This thought got started on my wife's simple question, have I had breakfast, and her offer to make me some, I told her eggs and toast. Not normal behavior, I am really a gruel person, but the protein in the eggs will be fine, and a couple slices of toast with butter are not too many. Breakfast at her pace means my toast will be cold, the eggs properly runny yoked, and she won't sit down to breakfast until mine is cooling on the table and she can complain about it. I did go to shave and ponder why I look so old for a real age of 7.8 years younger than my paper age.

I sit and have breakfast, and spread my butter, cold, on the toast, cold, and it doesn't melt into the toast - but I don't mind, I am here for her, she will never wonder why it isn't perfect if I never mention that it isn't. The eggs are just right, still hot from the grill, yoke breaking with my fork and running making everything covered in liquid gold. Three, good number, I break my toast and mop up the yoke from the plate.  She says I do it just like my father, and she is right, I do it just like my father - I imagine he did it just like his father. They didn't waste much of the bounty on the table, they were very close to where it all came from and properly thankful for God's goodness.

They didn't decide that chickens needed to be.... or that wild critters were... and that wetlands couldn't be drained, since they were part of a swamp reclamation area that produced tons of good food from the rich peat once un-dampened. Dad hunted squirrels, for extra meat in the stew. boarded in the town to go to high school. Different lives than mine. All I bring forward is grace, and mopping the yoke from the plate until the yoke and toast are gone - and thanking the cook for her care of the breakfast and my enjoyment of our conversation and memories of the past.